So there was a lack of epic in my epic post.

But, here it comes.

Today was such an odd day. I really didn't like it.

Today I missed Spanish, which really isn't good considering how many times I've missed that class. Then I was going to work on my rough draft, but I didn't, which means I fail at life, but whatever. Then, I went to Celia's Supermarket for Spanish, which was... interesting; Lizzie and I got some really odd looks, but I mean, it wasn't that bad, really. Then I had my Faulkner class. I had a nervous breakdown in class. Dasher decided that it was okay to throw like 80 things on to us that we didn't know about before. I had to GET UP AND LEAVE CLASS. I could not be in there anymore. Does he not know that we HAVE OTHER CLASSES?! I wanted to punch him. I went and sat in the hall. I thought I was going to cry, but I didn't. It couldn't really function though. I just sat there and stared for a full five minutes before I could even think enough to get up and go back into class. I seriously considering just grabbing my things and walking out, but I didn't. That probably would have been the last straw for Dasher. He would have been like, "Sarah, you fail. The end." After class I had auditions for Getting Out. The strangest auditions ever. I read for Ruby, a part that I REALLY wanted. But, my dad, who is probably thinking "If I don't cast her, she'll hate me, but if I cast her in a second play in two years [A SECOND PLAY IN TWO YEARS! YOU CAST PEOPLE IN EVERY PLAY!!!] then everyone else will hate me," decides that the best compromise option is for me to be the part of the loudspeaker voice. I won't even be on stage. He said that I "looked too young to play Ruby, and that you have good reading voice." Fuck that. Fuck a good reading voice. Then, after that, I went to Emily's room and we went to Walk-Mart, which was actually a fun little diversion from life. We listened to The Backstreet Boys LOUDLY and car danced like no one's business. Then. Guhh. I had a horrible moment with Jon that made me want to kill him. But, whatever... he's been an ass for going on four days now. Thankfully, Emily saved me and we went to Jonah's room for a bit, and listened to him and Shawn play Cecila for a while, which was actually pretty great. Now, I'm in the library, and should be working on my Spanish paper, but I'm writing this venting post instead.

BAHHHH!!!!!! ALKJFLSDJFSLJDF:LAJ!

I want to scream scream scream. I want to cry for hours. I want to get it all out of my system. I want it to all go away. I know that won't happen. I know it won't.

All of this work and stress has made me reassess my priorities, that's for sure. While, family will always be number one, the following numbers have certainly shifted around. I've been doing a lot of meditating lately, and I realize how important it is for me to spend that time at least once a day assessing what I need to do that day and about what's important. School has taken precidence over a lot. Not everything, but over a lot. I don't watch any TV anymore. I try to keep unnecessary socializing to a minimum. I live in the library. I pretty much do nothing but read and study. Also, some of my friendships have been strained lately, but I've learned through this that my friends are what keep me going, and keeping those frienships strong and healthy has become something that is a priority... it is difficult to do that, because of the amount of time I've transfered to school work, but I try to, at the very least, let my friends know how important they are to me.

I can't focus on this anymore.

I need to sleep.

I don't know when my Spanish thing is going to get done. I guess I'll just have to get up early or something.

[dies.]